We Will Sing of the Mercies of the Lord Forever!

Over the last few months, our church has been in a series called "The Blessed Life". David and I have tithed here and there over the past almost two years, but we never really had a clue what we were doing. Along with the series, our church gave a copy of the book to each one of the 7,000 people that attend our church. We got our book...and David actually read it. We listened carefully to every sermon, and we really started to understand the concepts behind tithing and giving. Tithing is NOT giving! It is simply RETURNING to the Lord what already belongs him. The tithe is to be taken from the income received BEFORE anything else! We either pay tithe online or we get a money order and have it filled out before we pay anything else. It is a majoy mistake to pay all the bills and see what's left in order to return to God what He gave you in the first case! The really blessing comes in giving (like offerings and toward special programs and causes). Tithing and giving of offerings puts us under the covering of God's blessing. God tells us to test Him in tithing and giving. Examples and instructions relating to tithing are found both in the Old and New Testament. David and I took the book and the sermon very seriously, we began tithing and also giving where we felt lead by the Lord. Here is some testimony of the months that followed the beginning of our obedience in January. What an excellent way to start the year! 1) Four payments have been removed from our monthly budget. Cutting out over $300 a month. 2) As an "offering" Dave and I bought $95 tickets to the local pregnancy center banquet. While at the banquet, we bid in the silent auction on golf tickets at Houston National and a large Easter basket for Jaxon. When our card number was written down by the check-out ladies, it was copied wrong and we received and email from the center. We felt awful and planned to come in the next day and make the payment right away. The director of the center (a good friend of ours), emailed us and told us that she has been blessed by our testimony and that the items were gifts, nothing due. David has decided to give the tickets to a friend of ours from David's previous employer. 3) When sending back our washer and dryer rental (a tough decision for me), we owed a balance. As the washer went out the door and down the stairs, I turned to get on the laptop and pay the balance. My phone email alert went off, and I found an email from the washer and dryer rental company. They offered to reduce our balance to resolve the outstanding balance today. I called David and told him, he said we only had $50 exactly on our money card (we do not bank; we put money on the card at the store). I called the account manager, praying that she would give me a number that I could use the card to pay with. After crunching some numbers, she told me that in order to the amount reduced I would need to pay the reduced balance of $50 even...:) I laughed, she was confused. 4) David used to double his normal check amount by picking up over time. Even when he was doubling his check, we were still just making it by...and believe me, we are not extravagant spenders. David's work announced a few weeks ago that they would no longer be offering over time on a regular basis. We were scared, but after reading the book and hearing the sermons, we remembered to trust God, continued to return tithe and give offerings. When pay day arrived, we were not surprised to see that his check was very small. We managed to pay every bill, give money to a friend in need, go out to eat, and buy some things we have needed for months around the house. We also put a significant amount in savings. Also, David has received a few phone calls to go in for over time this week, even though almost no one has been called in lately. 5) David got a ticket for $180 and missed his court date (I was out of state..and he got off task quite a bit ;)) When we went to pay the ticket, we were prepared to pay the ticket plus penalties and possibly having to get his license reinstated (if it had been suspended). I found a brochure at the counter for a $25 driving class. I asked the desk lady about it and she said David only has to pay $100, take the class within 90 days and the ticket will not go on his record! What a relief. We got lost several time trying to find the court house, David wanted to just go home and mail the payment in. Instead we worked together to find the place, and thank God we did! I'm glad He gave us the patience to navigate our way there to receive such a blessing! 6) Many of the apartments around us were affected by work that the water department did here last month. They left the water on several time over night and our neighbors received a bill for $400. A normal water bill here is around $30. Our bill remained the same and we were not affected at all :) 7) After being in a 2 year contract with Direct Tv for 6 months, our dish was moved due to the rebuilding of our porch. When the technician came to replace the dish, he could not find a line of sight. Because we could no longer use their service, they decided to void our contract with no fees, and no final balance due. They also removed all the charged from the previous month. SO that's $70 less on the budget, less time wasting and a ton off our electric bill! 8) In January, our electric bill was $130. In February, it went down to $85 (lowest since we moved here). We no longer have cable or washer and dryer, so our projected electric bill is $55 and I plan to see our gas and water go down as well! 9) My aunts, uncles, parents and sister/brother in law gifted us all the large items needed for Truett, almost $400 that we will not be taking out of our budget! 10) In February, I took my glucose tolerance test and had my iron tested. My iron has been low for years and I have a family history if problems with sugar. When I took the test, I was positive I had failed both. I was tired, crabby and downright mean afterwards. I received a call a few days later that both tests had come back NORMAL! My iron was high and my body handled the sugar overload beautifully! 11) In January, we noticed there was something serious going on with the suspension in our Expedition. The thing weighs 7,000lbs and the repair was going to be around $700. We budgeted for it and planned to have it done. A friend from David's work who is in mechanic school took a look at it and found that the air suspension was unplugged. This must have happened when our transmission was replaced. After he plugged it back in, David went a few miles down the road and the suspension worked again, 100%. Best of all, while thinking about all of these blessings, I looked into my bathroom mirror, and out of nowhere, I heard God say "I have more for you". David and I cannot express how excited we are for our future. We are also grateful that three months ago, we took a leap of faith and began to return the Lord's tithe and giving to those in need as the Lord directs. These are only things that have occurred within the last few months, I cannot imagine what God has planned for our future, I just know that we are so excited! I hope and pray that everyone and anyone reading this will understand that there is promised blessing in return to the Lord what is His already and having a generous heart toward those in need. Dave and I are so excited to teach these concepts to our children and also share with those around us! God Bless, Elizabeth Rose

My Fall Retreat

Around the last week of September, Dave and I decided that I would head north to Nashville and spend a month with my sister. She had been having a lot of early labor pains and we all thought I might be able to help when and before the new baby arrived. Well I have been here three weeks, and no baby yet! I have had a great time with my sister, her husband and their baby Arabella, now 16 months old. I am glad to say, I was also present when Arabella was born. There is nothing comparable to attending the birth of a sweet baby. Sweet and gross...;)

While visiting with my sister, I have had a great deal of time to think about life in general. We have talked about things we enjoy, crafts, our immediate families, and of course our childhood. Now that my sister and I have families of our own, we have been talking/thinking a lot about what we want for our children and our families as a whole. We are both raising our children in Christian homes, where both parents represent and support the principles and doctrines found in the Bible. Something we took from our raising, as our parents learned us in the faith we currently embrace. Our faith is something that can not be replaced by anything else, we know our children will come to the same conclusion.

As children, our mother always worked in the home. Through my sixth and seventh grade years, my mother did work in my classroom as an aid. Those years were very chaotic for everyone in our home. When my mom quit and started home school my sister and I again, peace enveloped our home once more. Life was never perfect, but it was always clean, organized and full of opportunity. My sister and I know for a fact, that we are to be "keepers in our home" as Titus 5:4-5 points out in more detail. Really, the Bible gives a clear job description for the wife/mother of the home. When I was married previously, and now in my current marriage, I have found that every time I attempt to leave the home for work, there is a stress and disorganization that Dave, the kids, even the dogs and I can not handle. Chores were taking longer to get done, I was unable to spend time with anyone, I was stressed and tired, emotionally unavailable to my husband and step kids. I could barely find time to buy groceries and I struggled to keep up with responsibilities at church. Once we moved to Texas, we again wondered if I should start working. I went to an interview at a job I would walk to each day. The pay wasn't great, no benefits, and I'd have to drag the kids along from time to time. Though the extra money wasn't much, it was tempting. In the end, God made the decision for us and revealed His plan for our future just in time. Amazing how He works. One might say "Miraculous" :)

Now that I am home on a regular basis, I have been able to fulfill my job description according to the Bible, as well as earn some time off to come share my talents with my sister. Earlier in the week, my sister and I started talking about the crafts and projects we have each been working on. We decided it would be fun to start a blog, displaying some of the ideas we have gathered from others, created ourselves and things we have tried and succeeded or failed at. Our blog is www.homesweethousewives.blogspot.com I am really excited about it, as I love to do all the writing, and I have gathered some great ideas over the past few days. I am so excited to get into quilting again! With the holidays coming up, there are sure to be some fun things on the horizon. My husband is also very excited to spend this holiday baking and cooking with me. Those who know my husband, yes I am still trying to take over the role of "chef" in our house.

Thanks for reading, and stay at home moms/wives, you will be blessed for fulfilling your role according to the Bible!

God Bless!  

Elizabeth Rose

Heros of Family & Faith

When I was a child, I watched the very first episode of Jon and Kate Plus 8. I loved their family and the fact that they were "Christians". I was inspired from the first episode to have a hot husband and a full nest. Well, it's no secret that the Goslins did not exactly succeed in showing the world the successes of a christian family.

I remember the first time I watched the Dugger family on television. I believe it was the very beginning when they were on a talk show of some sort. My jaw dropped as I watched the way this mother and father handled their family. I loved the way their girls were beautiful and their boys were handsome and in no way "dorky". The first time I insisted that my mom watch the show, she wasn't so sure...my parents don't watch tv really. She was in awe as well.

Anyhow, I can NOT believe the hilarious stuff people come up with online about these people. It sounds to me like a lot of them are jealous of unable to understand them. Here's a few fun ones (people who write these comments probably don't watch the show because their conclusions are inaccurate and refuted ON THE SHOW)

The Duggers have church in their home so the can be tax exempt. NO, they are part of a small church that meets in different people's homes every month. The Dugger's happen to have a large home that they use for the services from time to time.

By the way, the Duggers pay CASH for all of their medical needs even baby deliveries yes. How many people do you know that can do that?!

The Dugger children are happy. Don't believe me, watch the show. RARELY do you see a child throw a fit or need to be harshly corrected. And man oh man am I tired of poorly behaved children PARENTS GET A GRIP IF YOUR CHILDREN ARE A BURDEN TO THOSE AROUND THEM. If you don't know how to lovingly or correctly raise children, please have mercy on the world, have some self control and stop having them.

They are very wealthy ("prosperous" in the words of the Bible). Jim Bob and Michelle own several commercial properties that they rent out.

They are contributing to over population. Really? This one is funny to me. Have you been to rural Colorado? or any part of the midwest, just in America alone?! There is PLENTY of room for people on this Earth. People die every day. I would rather have a ton of people like the Duggers around than lots of space for a few more hookers, hobos, wife beaters, crooked politicians and child molesters. (all offered grace and forgiveness from Christ by the way)

Some people ask why they haven't adopted. Well, they can have children, so why would they take in adopted children when there are people out there who can't conceive?

These people have convictions about what they wear. They have aligned these convictions with the Bible. Their outfits and make up is cute and not Amish/1860s looking. All of their kids are adorable. AND HEALTHY! Have you seen one child with a food allergy or glasses?! Granted Josie is the first baby to be milk intolerant, but for goodness sake, she was a preemie that has excelled beyond medical reasoning. Michelle has explained their convictions about clothing in her blog and also said that it is "not for everyone".

People say these kids haven't been in the "real world". Since when was it cool to be in the real world? Maybe since it was cool to be pregnant at 14? The real world is sad and ugly. However, these kids have traveled all over the world, experiencing more of the "real world" than most of the ignorant people saying that they (the Dugger's) haven't.

The older kids take care of the younger ones. Um yeah...probably because they love each other. Their family is one that was conceived and raised in genuine love according to the Bible. They are taught to serve just as Jesus guides us to do so in the Bible. I have never seen one of the older kids complain. None of them seem to be in a hurry to get out of the house. Don't you think if they were sick of the babies, they would move out? Yeah, it's love people, I know it's hard to understand for some. Oh yeah and remember that one thing, unselfishness. Oh and servant hood.

LOL one person said "Shopping in thrift stores is not helping them adapt to the real life at all". HAHA! That's called "saving money" and being wise with finances, another thing that the world is losing a grip on. Remember that little thing known as national debt crisis. That is what "real life" should be doing. It's a life skill we should have all been raised with.

The Dugger's are NOT Pentacostal. Anyone who knows anything about Christian denominations would know that these people are Baptist, and they have mentioned it on the show.

No, having 20 children is not for everyone, their lifestyle is the way God intended family to be. It's literally plastered in scripture all over their home. I am SO blessed by this family and their testimony. Dave and I can only hope that we can come even remotely close to what their family is amounting to in number and integrity. If you have any questions about their family and beliefs, watch the show, they don't hide anything. It's called "reality tv" for a reason, and what they have is REAL.

Eat. Pray. Love.

While cleaning my living room facing kitchen, I decided to finally watch Eat. Pray. Love. Julia Roberts is one of my absolute favorite actresses and I’ve heard many great things about the movie and book. Though I was busy scrubbing dishes, my dishwasher on the verge of early retirement, there were a few things she said that made me stare up at the tv wide eyed in amazement. On top of that, the character’s name is Liz and the guy she is dating is named David. I had to laugh.   

                Here’s a quote that caught my attention, and if you know me at all, you know why I can relate:

Liz paces back and forth in her friend/therapists office she says “Since I was 15, I’ve either been with a guy, or breaking up with a guy! I have not given myself two weeks of a breather to just deal with, you know, myself!” Therapist says “What’s going on with you and David?” Haha, that has nothing to do with it, I just found humor in the name similarities. Earlier in the movie, she reads one of her writings to an audience. In the writing, she basically compares relationships to a drug addiction. That’s how it is for some of us, and for those of us who can relate, she is right on.

In life, sometimes we lose ourselves. I know exactly what it feels like as I am going through it right now. I have no idea who I am. I am scared to even step out and try stuff in fear of failure. Even my most controlled experiments have ended in failure.  I am NOT a risk taker. I will do things if they are well controlled by myself or someone I trust (which is no one), or if I am prepared beyond measure. I don’t really feel like I need to take a trip around the world to figure out who I am. There are some things in my life that I am very satisfied with and sure about. I love where I live and I am home here. I adore my husband. David was designed by God for me, and I have never loved any person place thing idea or feeling more than him. I know that I am a Christian and I have been sure of that since I was 4 years old. Other than those things, I am lost. I swear I lost myself at the age of 8. I love hearing stories about myself when I was little, like I’m hearing a story about someone else almost. Or maybe a missing child.

I think that’s why I have really clung to Oprah through the last few months. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t agree with everything she says and does. But that woman has her eggs in a basket. She is a very well rounded and put together woman (at least she appears as such to the world). Maybe I’ve tried to find my identity in people places and things, but those all have the ability to change. I know some things I like, I know some things I’m good at. But really, what use is it to be kinda good at a bunch of things, and not really good at any one thing? Soul searching in itself makes me tired and stressed.

I’m thinking about going back to college. Yes, again. I’m wondering when it’s actually going to stick. When am I going to go to college and end up in a career that I actually have a passion for. Maybe a “career” isn’t the right word. I love writing, playing my guitar, singing, photography, animals, and talking. Where the heck do you put all of those things together.  Jack of all trades? What?! That looks like a listing you would find in some dark category of craigslist. How do I find my purpose? Do I take career/personality tests online? Do I call a college advisor? Read my Bible? Pray?! NO idea.

Add insult to injury, or maybe the other way around…health problems. To have no purpose, sure, but then realize that your body hates you? It’s all quite frustrating, but I think I’m moving past that to the point of solution. I’ve accomplished my major goal: finding the perfect life partner. Now for the next steps. I wonder if it will jump out at me, or if it will take weeks, months, years maybe of wasted time and energy. This is where I came to the conclusion to stop “trying” to get pregnant. Why on earth would that seem like a good idea? “Gee I’m not sure who I am, maybe if I add a tiny person, they can help figure it out?!” NO, that’s called living out my dreams and repairing regrets through an innocent child. I won’t do it, on purpose. If I get pregnant at this point it’ll be an accident, no, a miracle.

Maybe it’s all deep rooted. I suppose the health stuff, family issues, man problems and broken bridges all have a major part in this deal. Yup, sounds like a tall order for a counselor. I’ll be getting on that this week. You can count on me to document most of it, because I know I’m not alone. I think a lot of people are in my position and it might help them to not feel alone.

“We all want things to stay the same, settle for living in misery because we are afraid of change and things crumbling to ruins. Ruin is a gift. Ruin is the road to transformation.” Eat. Pray. Love

My Heart, Christ's Home

When I named this blog, I decided on "heart and home" because those are two very important things to me as a christian woman. Over the last several weeks, I have been reflecting upon the choices I have made in the past few months. In October, we moved to Kit Carson, Co. Mid November, I was offered a part time job at a daycare outside of town. I was then asked to become full time, with the package deal of my own classroom and benefits. I got sucked in really fast and life just got out of control. I was sure I had made the right decision in offering to help my husband bring in extra money. I have felt convicted about the jobs I am doing right now, and what my duties should be, AND what I enjoy doing! My job quickly became futile. After childcare prices (we get no discount and prices went up since I began working there), gas to get to work daily (25 miles each way) and insurance coming out, we realized I'm really not making much money at all. I began to look around at my home, my husband and children, my responsibilities at church,  my current enrollment in a college class and my ambitions and realized that there is no place for this job in my life. OR reason for it. My kids don't learn anything there, they've been getting sick a lot, and I always leave my job stressed and extremely tired. Add to that the fact that Dave and I have opposite schedules. Oh and the fun behavior issues that have arisen in the kids.

Really, the worst thing about being employed full time, outside of home, is that it has taken me away from the reason we moved here. We moved here to get involved in our church, help grow and expand the ministry and reach souls for Christ. Being so busy and stressed has really taken a toll on my relationship with Christ. There is no job that pays enough to be worth neglecting time with Christ. I've found that the few mornings that I have cried out to the Lord (usually while driving to work), He touches my heart and I am overwhelmed with guilt and sadness. I so treasure the closeness I have often had with the Lord, and I can't believe I let it take a back seat in my life. NO MORE!

I have decided, after much prayer and advice from people we look up to, Dave and I decided that I should quit my job and stay home. I won't just be caring for our children (when they are here), Dave, our home, our dogs, but also going to college full time online for my Early Childhood Education Associates. I am also going to try to watch a few children in my home. I am so excited for my first day as a housewife! I have so many plans and goals. The main thing I want to do, right away, is make a place just for me. I want to pray A LOT, sing, read my Bible, write in my journal, and just clear the air so I can hear from the Lord. I know that the Lord can hear me no matter where I am, but it just seems life a special and comfortable way to set aside everything to be alone with the Lord. There also many ideas and activities that the Lord has brought to my mind for our church, and I dismissed them because I didn't have the time and I was too stressed. Yes I'll be busy with college, but that is something I enjoy, as long as I have SOME time for it.

There are scores of other things I would love to do and I will eventually make it to that place. I am grateful to the Lord, since this was His idea! (he always has my best interest in mind). I am also so grateful for David, who is also excited to see me more often and have me at home to make our home a special and relaxing place. I have also been in prayer that I will make a good friend, who encourages me in my faith. Since we moved here, I have had a small obsession with facebook because there are not many women to become close friends with. I know that God provides and He alone knows all my needs.

Thanks to an influenza outbreak at school, I currently have a fever and a very sore throat. Regardless, I am so excited for what my (Dave's and the kid's) future holds!

Mother Dog Saves A Baby's Life: Reaching Out.

I live my life taking care of other people’s children. I have done it since the day I turned 12 and I will probably never be so good at doing anything else. Well,I am pretty good organizing and singing, but those things just make me better at my job and at home. Though I have my moments, I rarely feel bitter about it. Yes, I have step kids…so I literally take care of other people’s kids every moment I am not asleep (and I do it in my dreams).

I was on Facebook the other day and found this story that really made me feel different about taking care of other people’s kids. Though it's about a dog, well that's the point...it's about a mother DOG in a poverty stricken area of Kenya. I pasted the article below, but I will sum it up here. Basically, a mother dog is foraging in the woods and she finds a baby. YES someone threw a newborn baby in the woods. It takes place in Kenya remember. The baby is in a package and she drags it to an old shed where her puppies were. Five of her six puppies had already died. When the baby was found in the shed, she was cuddled up with the mother dog and her baby. A dog, and a small one at that (see pics below), interrupted her morning of food finding, to bring a filthy screaming human baby back to cuddle with her new baby. No discrimination, no feeding the baby to her pup, she just sensed that this baby needed help. I suppose a mother's intuition is somewhat of a universal trait in creatures. I wonder if a starfish looks after her young...maybe has a little seahorse that wondered from his herd (after all, father seahorses are in charge of the new babies). Never mind. Do starfish even have eyes? Good grief, the orphans of the sea.

The point is, a DOG went out of her way to help take care of a baby that no one wanted. She saved the baby's life and the dog and the baby were adopted. A kind act, even done by a dog, got the attention of the world, and resulted in good. What good are we doing around us? I'm going into the woods to look for an infant. Not really. But I will pay closer attention to the needs of others, and reach out, knowing that the Lord will bless me for it. There are some things that women and mother understand better than other people could. For example, if a mother is crying because she can't afford formula for her baby, a guy might say "Ok, go pick a carrot and feed the kid" (or some varaition of the like lol). Another mother or woman ( I am not a mother exactly, but I've hung out with them and done their job for 12 years) would have compassion, understanding what kind of situation she is going through and how to help.

Please read the story below and allow it to touch your heart.

<3 Elizabeth Rose

Felix Omondi an 11-year-old student with Mkombozi in a compound on the outskirts of Nairobi, Monday, May 9, 2005. The nursing dog foraging for food saved the life of a baby girl abandoned in a forest.

Mkombozi's story is legendary in Nairobi, Kenya, if not the world. The African dog currently resides at the Kenya SPCA where she spends her retirement sleeping in a soft bed and teaching school children about animal welfare. It’s a good role for her, considering how the stray dog ended up at her comfortable home. After all, back in 2005, Mkombozi became famous for saving an abandoned newborn baby and carrying her back to her ‘home’, where she was nursing her own young.
The heroic dog reportedly found the infant, wrapped in rags, in the Ngong Forest where she was scavanging for food. She was seen dragging a package (which had the baby inside) across a busy road and through a barbed wire fence before disappearing in the poor Nairobi neighborhood where she was living with her puppies.

The infant and dog were soon discovered after two children heard the sound of a baby crying near their wooden shack, and alerted their parents. Aggrey Mwalimu, mother of the boys and owner of the shed, found the baby lying next to the dog and a puppy.
The baby was taken to the hospital for treatment for exposure, where she recovered after a few weeks in intensive care. Media in Kenya report regularly of newborns abandoned by mothers because of extreme poverty and their inability to care for the child. Most people who abandon babies are never caught.
After her last surviving puppy died, the mothering dog was taken in by the Kenya SPCA and tended to. The staff named her Mkombozi, which is swahili word for Savior. At first Mkombozi wasn’t overly happy to see her rescuers. Jean Gilchrist, executive director of the KSPCA recounted: "She wasn't happy when we all poured into the compound. She decided to leave, but kids in the compound brought her back for the bath because she was full of ticks." The tan short-haired mixed breed who was heavy with milk from nursing, was bathed and de-wormed and taken to the shelter.

Gilchrist speculated that the dog was possibly trying to care for the child because most of her puppies had died. "She reckoned it was a young animal and possibly wanted to bring it up," Gilchrist said. "It is something to do with the canine-human bond. Other dogs might have just left her there to die. ... She's obviously a very special dog," Gilchrist added. "She is a very street-wise dog, that is for sure. The other dogs in the compound did not look very well, but she is the fattest of them all - she obviously knows how to look after herself."
The KSPCA decided to adopt Mkombozi soon after, putting Mkombozi's days of scavenging for food to an end. And baby "Angel", as she was called also found a new home. Her story generated a lot of interest and she was adopted after police were unsuccessful in finding her mother and she was not claimed. Were it not for Mkombozi’s kindness and heroic act, Angel would not be alive today.

Thank You Memories

Though it’s typically forbidden among us women, especially the married ones, some of us just can’t help but remember those old loves. Not necessarily men, but places and things. I suppose, I personally am suffering some kind of shock one would experience after shooting through space at the speed of light. The last few months have been so fast and chaotic that I haven’t had much time or space for reflection. I’ve always been impulsive, reckless, and one of those people who just have to learn from their mistakes. When I sit and think about it, the things I truly miss will forever stain my heart.

I miss the sound of crickets and neighborhood dogs out my window on a hot night in Chattanooga, Tn. I miss sitting on the porch at my house in Chattanooga, in the valley, listening to the neighborhood kids play and bass speakers beating. I miss the thick rain that I could nearly breathe in. I miss the smell of the black neighbor’s barbeque, knowing that they’d be bringing some my way. I miss Sunday drives through Soddy Daisy Tennessee, and looking at those mountains, knowing there must be a God. I miss the cheap thrills of sneaking into the Chattanooga Choo Choo Hotel pool with friends when Charlie Daniels was staying there.  I miss the rush of the wind through my open car window as I passed the Nashville/Knoxville sign last April. I miss sitting on the back porch at my sister’s Nashville house with baby Molly, listening to the frogs. I miss the noise of downtown Nashville on a Saturday night. I miss the desperate anxious feeling I had while driving home from Nashville, feeling truly alone, but determined. I miss the morning air of Virginia and driving through the Blue Ridge Mountains every day. I miss the smells of fall and the leaves that fell in front of my Grand Rapids, MI townhouse as I walked to my car every morning. I terribly miss lying in bed alone in my cozy loft, listening to Jon Mayer or Johnny Cash and watching the snow fall on a lazy Saturday. I miss the summer of 2009 when I lived with Nicole Taylor. I miss our occasional karaoke, backyard pool adventures and watching movies. I miss when we were much younger, riding horses and hanging out every other day, not caring that we were dorky homeschoolers. When it was ok to be young and the drama in our life was Degrassi, sleepovers with our ponies, (marrying toads) and the county fair. I miss the moist wet air of Virginia, Tennessee and Florida that made my hair curl and my face shiny. Never thought I’d miss all that.

I miss my dog Roman, my Siamese cats, Sabrina and Hosea and my horse Autumn. Although I don’t talk to them anymore, I miss my friends from previous jobs. If it wasn’t for their influence, I may not have come as far as I have and I am truly grateful.  I miss the silly people in my life like George Choponis, who at 56 years old had a deep love for Hannah Montana and shamelessly blasted it from his truck while driving through our small logging town. I miss covering my head with a pillow every night when he blasted Hannah Montana: The Movie, in the living room. LOL. I miss Allison Degroot, Amanda Stuk and Brooke Vanhouten from Apple Tree who were there to make me laugh and listen to me whenever I needed. The girls who shared my love for children and the humors that came with our preschool job. I miss going to Zumba with Brooke and Allison and laughing our butts off about people who farted during stretches. Oh and Allison's "focused" face.I miss living next door to Kate Simons and sharing the "Lost" series. I miss working with Heather Maclellan Richmond, Britney Bennett and Lizzy Duff at Siskin. I miss Siskin itself, being as it was my favorite job.

Though I’ve been many places, and had multiple self-inflicted broken hearts, there are just some things that have stuck with me. Deep loves, that often times we have to say goodbye to. Sometimes it’s a safe place to close your eyes and go back to when you need a place to land for a minute. Thank you past people, places, things, jobs and pets. You are missed. But you helped shape who I am today.

Elizabeth